At this point of my flight training, it's hard for me to describe the kind of focus that I need to attain in order to feel comfortable flying an airplane by myself.
(Isn't that quite the opening sentence for a blog post? Poignant, to the point, with a bit of melodrama thrown in. Not to be confused with Melo-drama...)
That is why today, as I held the keys to the airplane I would be flying, I decided to give them back.
I've had a lot of things on my mind. Things that don't relate to flying. Things that everyone goes through at one time or another. But I suppose it's my time to go through them. Things that are potentially lifestyle-changing, finances and living situations. Some people don't let those things get in the way. But in my own experiences, situations such as these do affect my clarity of mind.
And so today was a very important lesson learned for me. Not that I learned it through a mistake, for second chances in the air are hard to come by.
I got to the airport about a half hour earlier than my booking. I knew I needed to do performance calculations, weight and balance calculations, as well as be grilled on emergency procedures by a duty-pilot, which is part of flying solo for students.
I'm not going to go into great detail, for I fear I may lose your interest, but through doing the calculations, trying to remember emergency procedures, and trying to get myself psyched up for flying, I could tell something was off with me. I had to re-do a few of my calculations, I had to brush up on my emergency procedures because I answered wrong when I was questioned about a procedure. I was at the airport for about an hour and a half before I was finally given the go-ahead to fly. As I stated above, once I got the keys, I decided that I better stay grounded today.
I've read some about the importance of not flying if you're lacking sleep, if you are sick, or if there are other big worries in your life. It's a common topic that comes up in the industry. Fatigue has been documented to cause many accidents in the air, as has an unfocused mind. I think having that knowledge influenced my decision of not to fly today.
I was given the choice of whether to fly or not. In the end I decided not to, but it was a close call. I contemplated it for a while, but looking back, the decision should have been easier and quicker. I think that as jumbled as my brain was, because of other worries, I had a hard time even getting my head wrapped around a decisions as small as flying or not. In the end though, sound judgement pulled through.
Funny enough, this feels as important a lesson as I have learned since I began my training. Thought it was a bit embarrassing to give the keys back and tell the duty-pilot that I'm probably not fit to fly, I'm still glad I did it. Who knows? Chances are it would all be fine, really. Chances are that I'd realize I'm sitting in a tin can with wings and it's up to me to fly it, and I'd focus right there and then. But there are no second chances in the sky.
In the past I've stated that flying keeps me grounded - almost like meditation. In the past, flying has made me forget about small worries, and made me focus on an exhilarating experience. But how about this for change? Sometimes staying grounded, will keep me flying.
This is one weird blog post. Sorry you had to go through that.
Shout-out to Adam! Thanks for your support, on AND off the court!
No comments:
Post a Comment